there's this NT boy who never fails to say hi when i come on MSN

Cutesis meimei don't quit maple please...althrought ppl u noob just don't care!please...don't quit maplekor will be sad! says:
haiz...

we miss u sia

last time u in our school we saw very happy de

now u change school le

:(

which is a surprise since i never exactly taught his class. i did have to endure numerous babysitting sessions in which i failed miserably to keep the noisy and boisterous kids quiet. except for a memorable session in which i confidently strode into the classroom and told them, "Class, today we are going to watch The Incredibles!" and was quietly sniggering away when i watched them ssshhhhh... one another into silence so that they could follow the movie. haha.

it's nice to know that your presence meant something to someone out there even when you know that you were a mere passer-by in his life

How do I remember my teachers/superiors?

I didn't think very much of my GP tutor because there was this occasion in which she dissed, "I don't wish to be sarcastic but your class has the highest number of failures among the 3 classes I teach" and being the GP rep, I had to bite my tongue so that i didn't retort, "true, our attitudes leave much to be desired but what have you done to try to help our class?". Of course, life turns full circle and this realisation hit upon me like a shockwave last year: We were her first batch of students after she became a full-fledged teacher. Just like 114 and 125 are my first batch of students. And maybe, just maybe i ought to be more sympathetic although she didn't even teach us topic sentences

I can't remember exactly how but my platoon seemed to have to do more work when compared to other platoons. and whenever we tried to discuss with our platoon sergeant about this, he would simply say, "Well, if you aren't happy, join the other platoon", which i thought was a little bit condescending. recently, I am beginning to see where he came from. i have reasons for undertaking certain things, you may disagree with the way i do things but you gotta trust that i know what i'm doing and really, there is no need to explain myself in order to pander towards you.

Ten years from now, how will my own students remember me?

Would I still be teaching?

This week, I received a phone call regarding a chemistry tuition assignment, which made me happy and reactivated an overwhelming sense of melancholy about how I probably won't be able to teach chemistry in this lifetime. why can't i teach students about titration? why can't i chide students for mixing indicators and solutions in the lab even though i know that this is what i used to do?

while i may not be phenomenally powderful at any one subject, it makes me feel privileged, knowing that i can easily do arts or sciences, given my aptitude for languages and never-say-die spirit for sciences. and when people marvelled at my move to study English Honours after 3 years of Chemistry, saying that "Kaile, you are so brave", I was able to brush all that aside because i know that it isn't such a big deal, really

it is ironic that something that i thought would give me leverage (ability to teach English and Chemistry) would turn out to be a stumbling block because schools out there either want Eng/Eng Lit teachers or Phy/Chem teachers

Or would I have left the profession, with fond memories of my teaching?

i must say that it's very cool to read my students' blogs and come across quotations which i showed them during class. or to ask a student to pen the quote of the day and see people actually furiously copying it down because they are actually interested

to have a student cite my habit of showing movies in class as evidence of the "Teach Less Learn More" policy for his General Studies In Chinese assignment and have his teacher comment upon it as "interesting"

to have another student say, "I want to learn from Mr Heng"

to come across ex-students' essays and beam with pride at their introductions and conclusions because they tried to practise what i drilled into them last year, despite my reservations about lessons being random

but it's very tiring to try to arouse students' interest and to remove their indifference towards GP. I look at the senior teachers in my department and never fail to wonder: How do they last so long? Why do they have so much love to give? How do i expedite my learning curve so that i may some day be as good as them, if not better? Would i settle for less and shortchange my students because i have turned cynical?

Guess these feelings are a constant work-in-the-making bah.